My Garden Hero

Did I Say That Out Loud?


Okay.  True confessions.  

I'll admit it:  I have no problem whatsoever with . . . profanity.

(Sorry Mom.)

I think a well-placed . . . expletive . . . can add just the right emphasis and level of meaning.  Y'know?  Plus.  Well.  Swearing (out loud) can help diffuse an otherwise frustrating situation.


That said, there's a time and a place for swearing.  And when it's NOT the time or the place, here are my favorite substitutes:

  1. CRAP.  As in . . . Full of.
  2. FREAKIN'.  As in . . . How can it take so freakin' long?
  3. DANG.  As in . . . Wow! Can you freakin' believe that? Holy-Moley!
  4. RATS.  As in . . . Oh, DANG! I cannot freakin' believe that!
  5. HOKEY-PETE.  As in . . . Hokey-PETE!  Are you freakin' kidding me?
  6. POOP.  As in . . . I really need to get my POOP-in-a-GROUP!
  7. JERK-WAD.  As in . . . That jerk-wad!  He just cut me off!
  8. SON-OF-A-GUN.  As in . . . It hurt like a SONofaGUN!
  9. TICKED.  As in . . . I am SO ticked off right now.
  10. HOLY-MOLEY.  As in . . . Holy-Moley!  That's some serious crap!

How about YOU?  What do you say . . . when you can't say what you'd really like to say?


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Jerk wad is a good one!


It's amazing how many variations of non-swear swear-words there are! Thanks for sharing yours, and feel free to check mine out :)


Holy Crap, you've got a boatload of good ones! I never think fast enough (or cleverly enough) to make the switch to a non-explitive and heck is the one that drives me batshit here in Utah.


I say Holy Moly all the time but I don't use it as a substitute for swearing.


Ticked is a good one. Doug often says (not to me) don't tick me off! Great idea Kym but hard to come up with 10!


Frakin fratch..that is a good list!


fun list - I wonder if I could remember Hokey Pete the next time I need it?!


"POOP-in-a-GROUP". Lol. My father was rather fond of dag-nab-it. My mother reverted to French and a well placed "Merde" was often audible. With some tongue biting and piercing #1 and #2 are employed here.

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