(This post . . . is supposed to be accompanied by a soundtrack. Whenever I include the clip of my chosen video, the entire format of my post goes just wonky. I am tired of trying to fix it. So. Just imagine Songbird playing as you read this post. Or click one of these versions and listen on You Tube. Christine McVie. Eva Cassidy.)
At the end of June, my mom was in the hospital for the first time - and I was just about to leave on my trip to Scotland and Ireland. I really needed a "mindful" knitting project. Something I could stop or start easily. Something I could memorize quickly. Something that was portable.
I decided on the charming-but-seemingly-endless ZickZack Scarf.
I knit through my mom's first hospital stay. A couple of international flights. In Scotland and Ireland. Through another, very long hospital stay. And then through time in skilled nursing/rehab. A trip to Colorado. Fretting on the road - or just at home. Bedside at the hospice facility.
My ZickZack scarf saw it all this summer. Worry. Hope. Joy. Adventure. Distress. Despair. Sadness.
When I cast off . . . finally . . . after running out of yarn two days after my mom's passing . . . I thought about giving the scarf away. Because how could I wear it? After all the angst and bad juju that was knitted right in?
But then . . . I thought about how much comfort this scarf gave me when I really needed some comfort. How each time I picked it up . . . a sense of calm came through me. My fingers knew just what to do - and the stitching brought me comfort and centering.
Besides. . . it turns out that this scarf . . . is the last thing of mine . . . that my mom touched.
Now, I'm looking forward to the comfort and warmth this scarf will give me whenever I wrap it around my neck.
For you, there'll be no more crying,
For you, the sun will be shining,
And I feel that when I'm with you,
It's alright, I know it's right
To you, I'll give the world
to you, I'll never be cold
'Cause I feel that when I'm with you,
It's alright, I know it's right.
And the songbirds are singing,
Like they know the score,
And I love you, I love you, I love you,
Like never before.
(Ravelry details here.)